Couples often forgo hard talks, and in my opinion there are few subjects as emotionally charged as money. When it comes to your finances waiting can be like a ticking time bomb. Take my advice and mesh out your money philosophy and current financial state before walking down the aisle. It will save you fights in the future and ensure that you both know where you stand from the very beginning.
This is an excellent time to look to the Bible for insight on how God wants us to manage money. A few verses that stand out to me are:
Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the first fruits of all your crops
- Proverbs 3:9
The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.
- Proverbs 22:7
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?”
- Hebrews 13:5-6
Remember to keep money in perspective and like everything else in a marriage the managing of your money is going to be an ongoing compromise. Start out with these 11 questions and then make a budget together. There is no better time than the present. Remember that when you say “I do”, you aren’t only saying it to the person standing in front of you but also to all their financial strengthens and weaknesses. Make sure you know what those are so you can plan accordingly.
- How much debt do you carry?
- What is your credit score?
- Are you a saver or a spender?
- Do you work with a budget? Do you keep track of your spending and saving?
- If/When we have kids will we be a dual income or single income family? Who will stay home, who will work? Can we live off of a single income?
- What mistakes have you made with money?
- What is the most expensive purchase you have made?
- How did your parents talk about money? Were they spenders or savers?
- What stresses you out most when it comes to money?
- How will we have tough money conversations?
- How do you follow God’s call to give?